Choir of Discontent [hinglish]

Laden clouds shed their burden.

Peepul droop heart-shaped leaves.

High on a limb, a black crow screeches

kaen-kaen, kaen-kaen, kya hai, yeh zindagi?

When we met in the realm of soul

did I agree to live in this darkness

Did you even ask, ke mere saath chalogi

zindagi ke uljhano mein? You

must have known, ke jo life

tum mujhe de rahe ho,vo kaisi hogi?

Refreshed with rain, green hearts

delicately flutter, whispering disdain

drowned by the indignant chorus

of kaen-kaen, kaen-kaen

Kyon laaye, tum mujhe yahan

kya paaya, iss kaale saaye se

jo na tik saki, yahan ya vahaan

rejecting, each notion of love

you compelled me explore

Asleeyat jaanti, toh kabhi nahin aati

aise aaeine ke saamne, jahaan

kaali hokar bhi, zindagi ke jhooton

se itni kam, ke koi reflection he nahin

nor illusions of being, toh iss

shareer ke anand, ka ehsaans kahan?

Jahaan, ek pal chaen nahin, apni

kaen-kaen, kaen- kaen, ke sivaaye

kuch kehna, ya sunna nahin

Kyon laaye mujhe yahan

aisi berukhi zindagi mein?

Kyon jagaaya ummeed, of

an impossible mission to live?

© Gopika Nath

Ashes [hinglish]

Kabhi sochti hu

tumse dil kholke

khoob sari baatein karu

Then I feel like battling

Sare gille shikve ka

Izhaar karu

Compel you

to appease my pain

Phir sochti hu ki bus

aur ladai nahin,

We’ve battled enough

Toh ab pyaar karu

But have you left me

the courage ke iss

kaabil hu

So jaungi aaj toh

laash jagane aoge

Ek bhi aansu tapkega

from those angry eyes

When I burn, will

Meri kahi and

Tumhari unkahi

also turn to ashes

© Gopika Nath

Whispers of Freedom

Get away
from this plodding stillness
of tantrums and affectations
posing for posterity
Tyres screeching from one time zone to the next
proposing newer and newer ideas for discontent

Breathe, beyond its stagnation
Listen to the wind as it whistles and trembles
whispering into every nook and cranny
Not those loudspeakers
blaring bhajans in the name of prayer

Be light and weightless
without the burden of remorse
Seamlessly flowing from
one season to the next

Published: Feb 2009

Drawn with Thread e-catalogue

Seven Art Ltd.

 

और कितने ? [hinglish]

They attacked an innocent weekend
in Hyderabad,
उनके आंसू अभी थम्हे नहीं
के अजमेर को आत्नक का सामना करना पड़ा
and as they reconcile
to the violation of a Sufi’s love
Ludhiana bleeds, as once before
when her turbans wrestled
How many, और कितने?
How many more, will we sacrifice
for the faith of peace?




 

Nimble Fingers

I went shopping today
Bought a pair of sandals
embroidered with sequins
beads, metallic threads
and tear drops



© Gopika Nath

Heart Song

I needed these words today
this remembrance
of being, once long ago
I was, now forgotten
in the humdrum of
worldly strategies, seeking
a return to love
That blissful union
of soul, where
I once was, me
with only myself

***

How did I go
so far from you

So far from a love
I gave but could not contain

So far from myself
that I did not recognize
you, you or you, him or her

My emissaries from
that yesterday when
you kissed my soul
with the bliss of nothingness

***

I am parched
So thirsty I sought
to drink from his lips
knowing the kiss
would never fulfil
a longing for you, knowing
how thirsty I was for you
I persisted because
I needed to touch, to feel
skin next to mine and
even though it never felt
as divine as you, I
persist for thirst slakes
my sinew, a thirst for
sweat, semen and skin
yours through him
I will always feel parched
but not alone, thirsty but
holding the glass in vanity
Knowing, yet denying
the essence of you
within me.

***

Is there no secret
I can keep from you

Every thought you hear
every feeling you know
even those yet unfathomed
by me

Every question, you
answer, before
I can complete
its punctuating mark

When you know me
so well and tend
my every need
Why do I seek another
skin next to mine
Why do I forsake
your caressing tenderness
for the sweat of him

***

These tears are for you
gratitude from my soul
bound till yesterday in
the agony of wanting
to be loved, knowing
I am, yet unable
to see you

***

Fill me
so that I can live
another day

Fill me, fill me, and fill me
with the subtleness
of you

Fill me
Fill this parched soul
with a renewed passion
for life

Fill me, fill me and fill me
that I may live close
very close to you.

***



© Gopika Nath

Reticence

>

The phone sits mute
on the polished table
cluttered with everyday things
So much remains unsaid
but fear has placed
a finger on these lips

Do you hear the wind
whispering among the leaves
Listen to the clouds trembling
under the wrath of thunder
a meek rhythm of your name

Can you see the red haze
in the laden grey sky
Or this fold of pearly-blue
behind the fiery sun
Amidst black puffs of engine smoke
Do you see mist in these eyes

Can you hear the ticking clock
in the darkness of night
but not the echoes of love
in the spaces between

The phone sits mute
A bulb flickers with hope
but wisdom keeps
a finger on these lips


© Gopika Nath

Dil Ki Kamzori [hinglish]

Vo bina helmet ke
badi teizee se
scooterchala raha tha
speed-breaker dekha nahi

palatne se
vo toh baal baal baccha
lekin jo samaan
saath lekar ja raha tha,
ek lohe ki machine
vo buri tarah
sadak pe gira

joro se
tyron ki cheekh sunai padi
an arresting crash
of something
brutally smashed

Driving in the opposite direction
pal bhar ke liye
dil ne kheecha, mn ne chaha
apni car ko rok lu
uss dabbee ki halat poonch lu

Then I thought of you
and remembered
that machino, ke koi dil nahin hote
yeh kamzori, toh sirf
insaano ko di gayee hai


© Gopika Nath

Maut [hinglish]

You killed yourself
Khud ko hi maar dala
Swathed
in the blood of humiliation
every muscle tissue now
is rigid as bone

Mere saamne
tumhari laash padi hai
but I haven’t come to terms
with death of an idea
hope nurtured through
a reign of pain

Chauth, aaj hai
lekin, tumhari arthi ko
kandha nahin mila
Nor have memories
and desires turned to ashes

Ek ajeeb sa ehsaans hai
almost as if, tum mare nahin
sirf, ek naatak kar rahe ho
I’m scared to light the pyre
in case you awaken
in the cooling embers
of an anger that killed

Lekin ek darr yeh bhi toh hai
ki I’ll keep you alive
but never see you turn
towards me again

Laash, ab tumhari nahin
meri padi hai


© Gopika Nath